A Tale of Two Kiddies

Where have you been?

Since I love lists, I figured it would be easiest to explain the 1+ year absence with a modified Top Ten List, so here goes:

10+ hours a day spent with twins. I guess I could stop there because really that's my #1 reason, but here are 9 more...

9 days away from them the entire year and I'm sorry but Paris and San Francisco are a lot more fun than blogging.

8 knitting projects currently ongoing or in the queue. By the time bedtime for the duo rolls around I am ready to veg on the couch, knit and watch...see #3.

7 days a week of non-stop toddler action.

6 meals a day to cook/prepare. Really only 3, but I need to fill #6 and if my math is correct 2 kids X 3 meals = 6!!!

5 -- oops forgot those 5 days in Key West with the girls, but who's counting the days away when you're spending 351 days WITH the kids.

4 little feet pitter pattering around my house, up and down the stairs...10+ hours a day. I don't want them getting into things they shouldn't, now do I?

3 hours of Reality TV a night. Between the 10 hours of American Idol on TV each week, the Project Runways and the Laguna Beaches (did I mention that I love America's Next Top Model) who has time to blog?

2 CRAZY toddlers

1 business-traveling husband

This post makes it sound like I don't love every moment with my kids and the truth is I don't. Wow, can't be THAT honest! Really, they are amazing and funny and cute and sweet, but they are also challenging, frustrating and irritating, too. I guess that's two 2-year olds for you, right?

100 Things About A&M

I was reading some blogs and saw all these "100 Things About Me" and thought it would be fun to do a variation of this about A&M.  Obviously these will change a lot over the months/years, so it will be fun to update it.

1. A&M were conceived in a petri dish.
2. Their due date was 6/21/04.
3. They were born 5/07/04 at 33w5d.
4. Alex is 2 minutes older than Mia.
5. Alex weighed 4lbs.5oz. and was hogging all the nutrients. 
6. Mia only     weighed 3lbs.5oz.
7. Alex spent 3 weeks in the NICU.
8. Mia spent 5 weeks in the NICU.
9. When they came home I cried and wondered WHAT THE HELL DID I GET MYSELF INTO?
10. Alex rolled over at 2 months old or 2 weeks adjusted age.  Smart boy!
11. Mia had reflux and took Zantac until 9 months old.
10. Alex used to be easily startled, which makes Mia laugh.
12. I would prefer to dress Mia in purple (b/c I love purple), but she looks better in pink.
13. They both have the clearest blue eyes I have ever seen.
14. People ask me ALL THE TIME if they are identical.  My response: "Nope, he has a penis!"  Then half the people argue with me that they are still identical.
15. People assume Alex is a girl because he has long hair.
16. They used to love veggies and avocado, now they don't. :(
17. They don't like much of anything, but raisins and cookies.
18. Mia tried to crawl at 8 1/2 months.
19. Succeeded on all fours at 10 months.
20. Alex was two weeks behind.
21. Mia walked around 14 months.
22. Alex was a month behind.
23. Alex ran and jumped first.
24. They are big talkers, but we don't always understand their words.
25. Both of them know many signs to communicate with us.
26. Their first sign was ALL DONE.
27. Their favorite sign is MORE.
28. Mia is the boss of Alex.
29. Alex lets her be the boss.
30. Mia is a biter, which is why she is the boss of Alex.
31. Alex never got the hang of biting since he didn't get his first tooth until he turned 1.
32. Alex likes to hit.
33. Mia loves to read.
34. Alex loves to push around the baby stroller.
35. Mia loves this, as well, especially when she can steal the stroller from Alex.
36. Neither of them are very interested in the baby doll that goes with the stroller.They LOVE their babydolls.
37. But they prefer real babies.
38. They will probably never get a real baby brother or sister.
39. Alex loves to play with sticks and rocks and bugs.
40. Mia loves the sliding board and swing at the park.
41. One of their first words was "outside."
42. After they said "duck."
43. Mia talks a lot now (and to think I was worried).
44. Alex started out talking to his hand.
45. He still talks to himself a lot.
46. Mia loves cats.
47. Alex loves dogs, until they bark.
48. They both love airplanes.
49. They've never flown on an airplane.
50. They like to hide their shoes (behind the library chair).
51. Sometimes they hide them so well I can't find them.
52. Mia wears a half size bigger shoe than Alex.
53. At 2 she weighed 2.5lbs. more than him.
54. He was an inch taller.
55. He's so skinny his pants fall down 1/2 the time.
56. They both have teddy bear blankets that they sleep with.
57. Alex sucks his thumb.
58. Mia used to have a more difficult time soothing herself to sleep.
59. Mia needs less sleep than Alex.
60. They both sleep 10+ hours a night.
61. They nap 2-3 hours a day.
62. Mia sleeps like her father...an earthquake wouldn't wake her once she falls asleep.
63. They like to give each other hugs and kisses when they're not fighting.
64. They hold hands and sing the "I Love You" Barney song.
65. They refer to Barney as Bar-Bar.
66. They didn't watch TV at all until they were 22 months old.
67. Now they would watch it 24/7 if we let them.
68. They LOVE Elmo, but not too much else on Sesame Street.
69. They knew all the characters on the show before they ever saw it from their diapers (Pampers).
70. Alex is now a bigger talker than Mia.
71. Mia is in speech therapy.
72. At 26 months they figured out how to climb out of their cribs.
73. Mia learned first and we found them asleep together in Alex's crib.
74. When they both started doing it 25+ times a night I bought crib tents.
75. Mia won't go to bed with the tent zipped, so we wait until she's asleep and then zip it.
76. She doesn't climb out anymore.
77. Alex likes to kiss our eyes, ears, nose and mouth when he says "Night, night!"
78. Mia gives eskimo kisses at bedtime.
79. They use several stalling tactics to avoid bedtime: more wa-wa, cuh-yahs (covers), baby, teddy (both of which have been thrown out of the crib), turning off the aquarium while we watch and then saying "Uh oh!" as if it is broken.
80. They love the water -- bathtime, pools, sprinklers.
81. Alex loves the ocean.
82. Amelia is scared of the ocean...
83. and the dark.
84. Alex loves to pick up live bugs and give them to mommy.
85. Alex likes to collect and hoard things.
86. Mia sometimes joins him, but most of the time prefers to run around.
87. Both of them LOVE play doh (doh, mommy, doh!)
88. Their favorite books are currently If You Take a Mouse to School and Catch Me! Catch Me! (a Thomas the Tank Engine book).
89. Daddy is currently #1 in our house.
90. Alex loves to count, but only to 2! (1-2, 1-2, 1-2)
91. They both love to sing, especially Mr. Derby's "Hop-Hop Song" or "Hello, Everybody" from Music Together.
92. They are not going to preschool next year.
93. They hit the terrible twos at about 26 months.
94. They are still REALLY good and funny and sweet.
95. Alex shares more than Mia.
96. Mia snuggles more than Alex.
97. They both love each other and say it daily.
98. A-yah and Ya-Ya (now Mi-A!) are their nicknames for each other.
99. People now ask me if she is older because she is bigger.
100. Alex and Mia are growing up TOO FAST.

Should I be worried...

...that Alex refuses to eat vegetables, but digs right into a bowl of dog food?

What is up with my child?  At my friend Anne's house Alex helped himself to the dog's food bowl.  Anne had to dig the little nuggets out of Alex's mouth.  But put a pea in front of him and you would think I had offered up dog POOP. 

Dear Alex and Mia

Dear Alex and Mia,

This weekend you turned one and momma's heart broke just a little.  It is hard to believe that a little over a year ago you weren't a part of our lives because I can't remember life without you.  This year went by so fast that your first birthday snuck up on me.  I am blown away that you are already ONE. 

I am not going to lie to you, this was a tough year for Mommy and Daddy.  The first 5 weeks we spent visiting you in the hospital.  It was difficult to bond with you when you were covered in wires and hooked to beeping machines.  And then you came home and it felt like I was treading water in mud.  The first 3 months were the most tiring, scary and hectic of my life.  Was I doing the right things to nurture you?  Were you getting enough to eat?  Were you each getting enough one-on-one time?  A lot of questions and no time to answer them.  We went from feeding to diaper change to naps and then started the entire thing over again several times a day.  I often wondered if I was really cut out to be a mother.  And then...

You smiled.

You giggled.

You snuggled your heads on my shoulder.

You reached your arms out for ME.

You cried when I left your side.

And my heart felt so full I couldn't imagine loving you any more.

As the months went by things got a bit easier, though easy is not a word I would use to describe life with twins.  We got on a great schedule, you became EXCELLENT sleepers and eaters, and mommy finally slept for more than 3 hours in a stretch.  I will NEVER forget the morning I woke up and looked at Daddy and said, "I think they slept through the night.  I can't remember waking up!" 

Now you are changing almost daily.  I am in awe as I watch you discover new things, including each other.  One day I was in the kitchen making lunch and all of a sudden I heard both of you giggling away.  I peeked into the playroom and you were both rustling a magazine and cackling.  It is such a joy to watch you, a brother and a sister, develop your bond.  I think a lot about your future, but mostly I hope and pray that you will always love each other and make each other laugh as you do right now.

Alex -- for the first four months of your life you NEVER smiled.  I kept asking the doctor what was wrong.  I was so sad about it.  You were skittish and the slightest thing could cause your lip to pout and the tears to flow.  You have transformed into the silliest little boy EVER.  Daddy gets you started and you can't stop laughing.  We make faces and noises and you smile the brightest toothless grin.  You love the MOOOOOOOOOOO a cow makes, you race across the floor whenever daddy chases you, you love to bounce -- especially with Daddy and Grandpa.  You are a joy to watch every day and are changing so rapidly that I have to remind myself to take mental snapshots every day so I can remember these moments.  Today you started talking to your hand and it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.  You are momma's little boy and always will be, even when you're 30.  G*d help your girlfriends!

Mia - for the first six months you were our easy baby.  You rarely cried, smiled a lot, and giggled early and often.  As you began to discover new things and your world got larger, you became quite a handful.  You are the most inquisitive child.  You love to stare at people (especially strangers), you've never met a mirror you didn't love and your curiosity is a joy to watch.  You laugh loud and cry louder.  You want the world to know you're here and make that message known loud and clear.  You weren't a big talker, but did a lot of squealing and growling for the first 11 months.  Momma was concerned, so she called the doctor who told me to try not to worry.  She was right.  You started to babble and now you rarely shut up.  Hearing you say ma-ma-ma-ma-ma was an amazing joy and you even did it for the first time on Mother's Day.

I am the luckiest Mommy in the world.  You two are the most beautiful, curious, playful, healthy and easy children.  A part of me is sad that the year is over, but the amazing experiences yet to come make me the happiest Mommy in the world.  I am so lucky.

I love you,
Mommy

Should I Be Worried...

...that Alex's current favorite toy is my birth control package?  You know the round, plastic container that can't be mistaken?  Well, it just so happens that they make great teething rings.

And just so my one or two readers don't worry, I DID remove the pills.

We have teeth...finally!

I was beginning to think baby dentures were in our future.  At 11.5 months Mia had only two teeth and Alex had none.  This did not stop them from gumming  any food I put in front of them.  They are my husband's children, afterall.

This week has been pure hell for all of us.  They are cranky and out of sorts by night, I am cranky and out of sorts by day.  You get the idea!

Collectively they are cutting 8 teeth, all on top.  Amelia has cut 3 of 4 teeth, Alex has cut 2 of 4, which means that the hellish nights are not going to be over anytime soon.

On the up-side, at least they are cutting these teeth at the same time.  Poor babies!

The post in which I bitch about my MIL

I could regale you with tales of my mother-in-law, I assure you it would not be boring.  The woman is the best guilt-tripper and as self-absorbed as any person I've ever met.

I truly believed that she was so excited to be a grandmother that MAYBE, just MAYBE, some of the self-absorption would disappear.  WRONG! 

I admit, I'm a beeyotch, but I would have met her halfway if she would have even tried.  A&M will be 1 (1!!!) in less than a week, and since they were born she has done nothing to make things easier for us and plenty to make things more difficult.  Case in point, she booked a trip to visit us on the ONE weekend I told her she could not come (the weekend the babies were going to be released from the NICU).  When she does visit all she can do is complain about my "rules" and then completely ignore them.  With TWO babies the last thing you need in the beginning (or ever) is for someone to make things more difficult.

She only calls when she has her own agenda and she barely asks about the kids.  On the flip side, Brian's step-mother calls at least once every week or so and the first thing she says is, "How are the babies?"  As a result of her calls, I call her more often.

My MIL was bitching to SIL recently that she doesn't know anything about A&M.  Do they have teeth? Are they crawling? walking? talking? 

The thing is, all she has to do is ASK.  Is that so difficult?

Hello, Target Pharmacy

Let's just say you were my real-life friend and tried to call my cell phone the past couple days, you might have gotten the Target Pharmacy OR the Laura Mercier counter at Saks.

This is due to the fact that I lost my mind AND my cell phone on two SEPARATE occasions the past two days.  I did what any smart person who has temporarily lost their mind (and most important means of communication) would do and called my phone.

The first call (made from my home phone) went something like this:
Ring...ring...ring...(as I scrambled frantically around my car hoping my cell phone was stuck between the seats)
Male voice: "Hello, Target Pharmacy!"
Me: "So, that's where my phone is!"

The second call (made from the Saks jewelry counter because that woman was so NOT busy and I wondered if I was going to be her only customer interaction for the day) went like this:
Ring...ring...ring...(as I prayed that I didn't have to walk the entire length of the mall to find the damn phone)
NO answer, so I started my trek back into the mall when I heard the clear and OBNOXIOUS tone that tells me when I have a missed call.

Now I know why that Missed Call tone is SO FREAKIN' ANNOYING ... and useful.

Beerthday Gifts

Me: What should we tell your parents to get Alex and Mia for their birthday?

Brian: KEGERATOR

Uh, yah...I'll get right on that!

She speaks!

Mia growls, grunts and squeals, but up until recently she didn't really "speak."  Over the past 11 months we've heard lots of grrrrrrrrrrssssssss, uh-uh-uhhhhhhhhhs and AAAAAA-EEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYS, but not a lot of babbling of consonants.

Being a first-time mom, I started to grow worried when I read ON THE INTERNET (why do I do that?) that 75% of babies are babbling consonants by 10 months.  So, I did what any first-time mom would do and called the pediatrician.  I tried to sound all casual about it, starting out by saying, "OK, I know she's going to talk by the time she goes to college, but..."  Being the great pediatrician that she is, she assured me that Mia is still well within the NORMAL range.  I know she's normal, but it is still nice to hear.  We agreed that if by 1 year she wasn't babbling consonants we would get a referral to a speech therapist.

Looks like we won't need that referral after all.  This weekend, not only did Mia speak, but now she WON'T SHUT UP.  All of a sudden she is all "bwa-bwa-bwaaaaaaaaa!" and "ba-ba-ba!" and "bla-bla-bla!" 

When she starts talking back I'm sure I'll wish she never started talking in the first place, but for now this is the milestone I've been the most excited about.